Ask Jenna: How can I stay more focused on my writing?

July 24, 2013 by 2 Comments
I received some great questions from one of our Writer’s Circle members the other day about staying focused on writing, and she gave me permission to answer them here.
 

The Question

First, here’s her question:
[I’d love some] tips for getting more focused when I’m writing. Several factors are at play, I’m sure, but probably the biggest ones are:
 
1. Internet Addiction. It’s a bad habit, but I am constantly checking for new email messages. Need to shut off the interwebz while I’m working, but I find that even if I do that I still find other ways to distract myself (getting up for water, making lists of other things I need to do, etc.)
 
2. Resistance. The usual. It’s easy to be excited and loose with my ideas when I’m not facing the keyboard, but as soon as I say it’s time to work I freeze up, get distracted.
 
Any tricks for combating these issues?
 
I feel like it’s just a matter of discipline, but even knowing that I still haven’t been able to make better habits. And, even more frustrating, it’s only when I’m working on my own projects — the things I should be MOST excited to have time for. If I’m writing for someone else (with a deadline, for money) then it’s not a problem because it’s just a task to cross off my list, so I do it.”

The Answer

Here’s my answer:
 
First, great questions, thank you. Second, here are some thoughts to get you started with this shifting all this:
 
  • For the internet: Experiment with being super ruthless about the rules (for now) about what you’re allowed to do or not. For example, turn off the internet connection while writing, close the email program, maybe even try the app Freedom to block access to all internet related stuff for a specific chunk of time.
  • Pay attention to all the things you distract yourself with and figure out a system for them so they can’t distract you. This is what I call “You-proofing your writing” (more on this in a future article). Don’t see these “distractions” as failures, but as parts of the puzzle to refine. Examples:
  1. If you typically find yourself getting up for water in the middle of a writing session, design a new routine to get a glass of water before you sit down to write. I keep a bottle of water next to all my writing spaces so can I refill my glass easily.
  2. For to do lists, consider a 5 minute purge of everything on your mind before you start working. Or keep a pad of paper close at hand so you can quickly jot things down and then get back to writing. I like to use the app “Things” to track my ideas and to dos, so I pop into that program and put things on the list if they nag at me while I’m writing. Yes, it’s better not to break concentration. But if it’s keeping me from focusing because I’m afraid I’ll forget it, it’s worth it to me to take a moment to get it down.
  3. Other distractions might include taking phone calls (turn off the phone if you can or have caller ID so you can see if it’s your kid’s school calling), having a messy desk (dump everything in a box!), people dropping by (put a sign on the door that says “Do Not Disturb”), etc. Think about the possibilities, notice when they come up, and see what you can do to anticipate them.
  • Be mindful of the distractions on an emotional level. For example, if email is your downfall, think about why you’re called to it. Are you looking for something in particular? I find that when I’m feeling vulnerable, I’m more likely to turn to email as if I can find solace there. It doesn’t work, and it’s worth seeing that I have an unfulfilled need so I can seek fulfillment for it elsewhere in its proper place. Or notice that you want to get up and get water right when you’re reaching a hard part of the project. How can you support yourself through that moment rather than turning away from it?
  • Understand your resistance: On a similar note, we “freeze up” because we get into flight/fight/freeze mode when tackle our own projects because our projects MATTER to us on a deep level. Being AWARE that distractions and things like finding it easier to work on other people’s projects are all part of the normal fears that come up about writing can make it easier to stick with it and navigate it, using things like:
  1. Setting super small goals so you can more easily talk yourself into doing them, e.g. 15 minutes. Then stick to it. You can increase the time the next day and beyond, but the idea is to create the habit around a strengthened comfort level first. So it might be slower at first but it will pay off over time. It’s a bit like building muscles up over time.
  2. Using a timer to help keep you focused for the duration of your writing session goal. I find I’m much less likely to get up or do other things while I have a timer running. It might seem silly or weird but it’s worth experimenting with.
  3. Talking or coaxing yourself through it. When you notice yourself getting distracted or feeling stuck, tell yourself, “Okay, this is just fear coming up. I know how to do this. It’s just putting one word on the page after the other, and I can even change it later if I don’t like what comes out. Just one word after the other.” Or something like that. Acknowledging the fear really helps. Discipline doesn’t help here as much as self-compassion does.

Your turn

Do you have a question? Submit through my contact form here and I’ll do my best to answer you on the blog.

Also, what do you notice about your typical distraction patterns? Post them in the comments and I’ll toss out some system strategies for you too!

Warmly,

 Jenna

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Seeing it through to the end

July 17, 2013 by Leave a Comment

On the Welcome Call for our Writer’s Circle session that started yesterday, it was fun to notice how many members were talking about finishing. So many of us were at that point of having just finished a major draft or putting the finishing touches on one.

After having run the Circle now for going on two years, it’s deeply gratifying to see so many writers reaching that milestone.

It got me to thinking about the ingredients that go into the mix to make that happen.

It strikes me that there are both internal and external aspects to these success stories. What I see on the internal side is:

  • Vision — having an idea or a calling to see something come to fruition.
  • Passion — having a love or interest or fierce desire for a specific project or idea.
  • Decision — making the decision to tackle the project.
  • Courage — having the courage to dive in to the unknown.
  • Perseverance — having the wherewithal to stick with something.
  • Intuition — knowing when something is right for you, or not.

Hopefully we have all these skills. If we don’t, we can strengthen them within ourselves. (And there are good coaches and therapists who can help us do just that.)

So yes, completing any project requires a tremendous amount of drive, determination, and courage. But even the strongest of strong-hearted among us get tripped up by a laundry list of obstacles, like:

  • Doubt — what if I can’t do it?
  • Fears  — of success, failure, rejection, disapproval, shame
  • Resistance — the force that repels us from our dreams
  • Procrastination — our tendency to put off anything that moves us toward completion of our dreams
  • Perfectionism — the belief that perfection is attainable and that if we’re not hitting it, we’re failing.
  • Bad habits — putting vices before taking action on our dreams.
  • Poor self- management — struggles with discipline, decision-making, commitment, time choices.
  • Poor self-care — not taking care of our bodies, minds, hearts, and spirits.
  • Comparison with others — thinking other people are doing better than we are.
  • Obsessing about our chances of success — focusing on the big questions rather than doing our work.
  • Approval-seeking — looking outside ourselves for validation of our talent or ability.
  • Life challenges — stopping when life gets hard.

Many of these things can be solved with self-awareness and determination, and yet what I see time and again is that we can draw on resources outside ourselves to help us make it through the rough patches. Things like:

  • Support — there’s nothing quite like having other people believe in you, especially when you’ve temporarily forgotten your own skill and ability.
  • Daily accountability — having support to see it through, to keep showing up and do the daily work is deeply motivating.
  • Community — being a part of a community where you are with other people who truly “get” what you’re experiencing helps end the sense of isolation we can all experience at times.
  • Energy — the shared energy of working together, whether side by side or as a team, can move us into action when we’re otherwise flagging.
  • Inspiration — a shared spirit of energy and enthusiasm can reignite us when the going gets tough.

The question that strikes me is this: Do you have the support you need to weather the challenges of creating your dreams? If not, how can you create that for yourself? Tell us what you think in the comments.

Warmly,

 Jenna

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Writing even when overwhelmed

July 10, 2013 by 3 Comments

As writers and creatives with a certain sensitivity to life, we can get easily overwhelmed, which can be paralyzing, deeply uncomfortable, and hard to break free from.

Let’s talk about why that happens and what we can do about it.

There are a few different ways overwhelm happens, and they inform us about how to handle the overwhelm, so it’s useful to look at what’s gotten us overwhelmed in the first place.

1. We get overwhelmed by the size of a project.

When we’re taking on a big project (like writing a novel, for instance), if we look at the entirety of the thing, it can be overwhelming just to contemplate, let alone begin it. I’m reminded of the joke about how to eat an elephant. If we look at the whole thing, it feels impossible. But when we think about taking “one bite at a time”, we can begin to see how to start going about it.

Solutions

  • Break it down into component parts. For example, with a writing project, we can start with brainstorming, or an outline. Then we can tackle one scene at a time.
  • Make a list of everything you’ll want to do — then put it away. Focus on one thing at a time and stop thinking about the big picture, or you’ll make yourself crazy.
  • Look at working in small increments of time, as small as 5 to 15 minutes a day. It’s quite surprising what we can accomplish in these little chunks. I wrote my screenplay Rift in 15 to 30 minute increments, and it was thrilling to see the page count creeping up, day after day.

2. We get plain old overstimulated.

If you fall on the highly sensitive side of the spectrum, you’re more sensitive to stimulation of any kind, and have a lower threshold for stimulation than the rest of the population. This means that you’re more likely to get overwhelmed earlier than your peers, which can feel a little crazy making when everyone else seems to be able to handle it just fine, thank you very much. But overwhelm from overstimulation is just as paralyzing as the other types.

Solutions

  • Remove yourself from the source of the stimulation.
  • Give yourself time to recover.
  • Have a repertoire of soothing practices to get grounded, balanced, and present again.
  • Notice that writing will often help you feel more grounded, balanced, and present again.
  • Plan ahead to keep stimulation at a manageable level in the future and build in recovery time.

3. We get overwhelmed by life.

Then there’s the “garden variety” overwhelm we experience in our busy world. There’s always more to do, more to take on, more to handle. Someone always needs something, there’s a project that’s due, our kids are sick, you name it.

And it can be easy to let something like a writing habit or a passion project fall to the wayside in the midst of all that. But the cost is far higher than you might expect. It turns out that feeding the passion we feel and fulfilling the commitment to our deeper selves is critical fuel we need to actually handle the overwhelm. Even at a time when “one more thing” feels like way too much, putting ourselves first — just like we put our oxygen masks on first — is key to staying grounded and sane when the going gets tough.

Solutions

As far as solutions go, it depends.

First ask yourself, is this an ongoing pattern in my life? If so, the answer is to look closely at what you’re doing and why you’re doing it, to see if there is anything you can let go of, delegate, or defer. Be willing to keep your passion project at the top of the list, and let go of other obligations. Your first obligation is to yourself. Choose wisely.

On the other hand, if you’re experiencing an unusual period of intense work, simply “contract” your expectations on your project to an attainable level. For example, write for 15 minutes instead of an hour, or pick out the tiniest piece of your project to focus on.

  • Be willing to look at what you might need to let go of.
  • Contract your project expectations to a reasonable, attainable level.
  • Remember the value and importance of feeding your soul’s passion.
  • Build up to more over time.

4. We get overwhelmed by major life stresses and events.

Beyond the “ordinary” level of overwhelm we feel in our day to day lives comes the extraordinary kind of stress and overwhelm we can feel when a major life event dominates our experience, like a parent being hospitalized, a major relationship upheaval, the death of a loved one, or personal surgeries or health issues.

During times like these, pretty much everything drops off the radar that isn’t “critical path” to handling the major life event. In my opinion, that’s okay, especially during the true crisis times. But once things start to settle down into a “new normal”, see if you can find your way to doing the contracted version of your project I mentioned under number 2, above.

Solutions

  • Give yourself time and space to deal with the major event.
  • Return to the project as soon as you reasonably can, at a minimal level of engagement.
  • Build up to more over time.

5. We get overwhelmed because we’re burnt out.

When we are creatively (and energetically) burned out, we can get overwhelmed by the simplest things. Keeping the house clean, dealing with paperwork, and handling the basics of daily living can make us want to crawl back into bed and hide.

Usually this happens for a couple of reasons, including dealing with the ongoing high level of expectations we have in our culture about what we should be able to do in any given day (see #2, above), and dealing with major life events (see #3, above), but it can also include the creative backlash that comes from pushing ourselves to the point of burnout.

In other words, if we’re working crazy hours to meet a deadline, we become exhausted when it’s done, and no surprise there either. But few of us allow ourselves to take time off when that happens.

Solutions

  • Plan to take at least one solid day off after a big push, maybe a few more.
  • If you’re creatively burnt out, give some thought to how you’ll refill your creative well with interesting and inspiring ideas as you recover. My favorites: museums, art stores, toy stores, TED talks.
  • If you’re energetically burnt out (which usually goes hand-in-hand with creative burnout), seriously ramp up your self care for a while. You’ve just taxed yourself and you need time to bounce back.
  • Keep the writing going by doing morning pages during this time, or if you already have a next project to work on, put in the minimum amount of time on it and then take the rest of the day to renew. But do it first, so you can fully enjoy the time without the low level of stress and anxiety that procrastination creates.
  • Transition yourself to a regular writing habit so you won’t have to work so intensely in a big burst all at the end (if you need help with this the Writer’s Circle may be just the ticket for you.)

Your turn

What works for you? How do you deal with overwhelm? We’d love to hear from you in the comments on the blog.

Warmly,

 Jenna

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Set your truth free

July 3, 2013 by 5 Comments

One of the struggles writers often face is the fear that comes up around sharing the truth through our work. It might be the truth about what we think or about who we are. Or perhaps it is about actual experiences we’ve lived, like those we might share in a memoir.

I’ve talked to so many writers who are afraid of what will happen when they tell their personal stories or write their memoirs. Fears about hurting people we care about, fears of being rejected or disliked for speaking the truth. These fears can become real impediments to seeing the project through to completion — and sometimes to even starting it at all!

Mary_Montanye_8.12When Mary Montanye joined the Writer’s Circle on a colleague’s recommendation, she was almost done with her memoir — but not quite. She was feeling stuck around moving to the final completion point with the project — a tough moment for any writer — particularly because her memoir would set some deep and personal truths free into the world. We were proud to help her cross that finish line with the support of the Writer’s Circle.

I asked Mary to share with us about her experience of completing her memoir and of participating in the Writer’s Circle.

Perhaps you will be inspired by her story to complete your memoir also. :)

Mary, welcome and thanks for being here.

First, let’s talk about your accomplishment — finishing your memoir! You joined the Writer’s Circle and finished your memoir in your first session, right? What was that like for you?

I did finish it in my first 4-week session. I was very close to the end when I joined the Writer’s Circle. I had been working with a published memoirist/writing coach/teacher for quite a few years and had learned how to write a memoir. She’d helped me dive deep, find the truth and the emotion beneath the “facts” of what had happened. This was good and it made for a meaningful story. However, because I was sharing my truth and some lifelong secrets, I also found it very difficult to push through to the end. Regardless of how often I was told that I didn’t have to “put it out there” if I didn’t want to, I knew the next step after finishing a piece of work was trying to get it published or, if nothing else, to share it with family and friends. This terrified me and, as I closed in on the finish, stopped my writing altogether. Getting over this hump and writing “The End” on the final draft felt great! I have to say this was a highlight of my life.

How long had you been working on the memoir prior to joining the Circle? In what way did the Circle help you get over the hump to completing it?

I’d been working on the memoir off and on for five years before joining the Writer’s Circle. The Circle provided not only accountability and structure but also a connection to other writers who were putting aside their fears to do what they felt called to do. My writing teacher did provide accountability, but her function was to help me become a better writer. Sometimes when you’re always looking to improve, you never get to the place where you can declare something done, especially when you’re afraid to declare a piece done, as I was.

What can you tell us about yourself and about the focus of the memoir?

When my husband and I were living and working in Orange County, CA, I bought — on the spur of the moment and by myself — a cabin in a mountain canyon in Colorado. My grandmother had lived in that same canyon when I was a child and I had fond memories of it. That action changed not only my life, but my husband’s and my mother’s lives. The memoir is based on that. How we all got to the point of living in this beautiful mountain canyon and how it affected our relationships with one another. It is also a story of healing from physical illness and childhood abuse.

How did you find out about the Circle and what inspired you to join us?

I was taking an online class — not sure which one it was now — when one of the other participants mentioned you, Jenna. She loved your newsletters and commented that she was learning a lot from you and thinking about joining the Writer’s Circle. I checked out your website, was very impressed, noticed that another Circle session was about to begin, and decided to join. I was feeling stuck in the memoir, but had decided it was time to stop working with my writing coach. I was ready to go out on my own, so to speak, and liked the idea of connecting with a group for accountability. Because I travel a great deal, it was important that the group meet online. First, I signed up for one session to see how I liked it. I am now on my second 4-month round. I liked it a great deal!

What have you learned about your writing process from participating in the Writer’s Circle?

I learned that, personally, I need structure and accountability. I’ve always been the type of person who follows through with her commitments. If I declare to the group that I am going to participate in a sprint or be on a coaching or welcome call or write for half hour that day, then it’s likely I’ll do it. The Writer’s Circle gives me a place for that kind of accountability. And the Circle gives me a connection to other writers and coaches who are writers themselves so I don’t feel so alone or unique in my creative struggles. I also discovered that there is an ebb and flow to my creative output. Jenna, her coaches, and the other writers in my small group accept that and honor it. This has normalized for me my way of creating and how my day-to-day life can affect my writing.

What were the biggest challenges you faced before joining the Circle? Have they changed? What’s different now about your writing habit?

The biggest challenges I faced before joining the circle were (a) believing that my desire to write was not a valid reason to give it time; and (b) that I was a writer at all! Both these challenges disappeared almost completely in the first month, and that’s pretty amazing given that I’ve held onto those opinions for most of my life. Before joining the Circle, I would go long periods without working on the memoir. During those periods, I struggled with depression because I wanted to write but was always talking myself out of it. I know it sounds strange, but that’s what was going on with me. Participating in the Circle gave me a reason to show up to the page and for me, that’s huge. Once I’m actually writing all the excuses and fears fall away for a bit and I know I’m in the right place doing what I need and want to do. These days I rarely miss a day when I’m not writing something and therefore I am also much happier.

What advice do you have for other writers?

My advice to other writers is: Don’t underestimate your desire to write. If you have that desire this is something you are supposed to be doing. I compare it to singing for me. I have absolutely NO desire to sing in a band or a choir or even alone in the shower and that’s a good thing, because I also have absolutely NO talent for it! I believe we are given desire to accompany the talents we have. This isn’t to say that there won’t be times when we won’t want to write. Jenna, her coaches and the other participants of the Circle have shown me this happens to all of us at one time or another. Still, we return to the work because that’s who we are — writers.

What’s next for you and your writing?

I’m not sure what’s next for me. I still haven’t decided whether or not I’ll publish the memoir. I think I might publish a small printing through a self-publishing venue and let my friends and families read it. Then, after their input, I’ll decide if I want to try to market it. But I do know I will stay on in the Writer’s Circle (I’ve just committed to another four sessions) because they are my people and my life feels fuller when I’m connected to them. And I’ll keep writing … whatever it is I feel to write on any given day.

Is there anything else you’d like to tell us?

I’d like to add that I truly believe that we need to be doing what we feel called to do and to find whatever help we need in order to do it. If we do so, we will be happier people and therefore so will our families, friends and communities. There IS time. Whether or not our work is ever published is not the point. The point is that as writers, we write.

Thank you, Mary!

Your turn

If you’d like to celebrate with Mary, please leave a note for her in the comments on the blog. And if YOU’RE dreaming of writing a memoir, tell us about it too and we’ll cheer you on!

Warmly,

 Jenna

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Two conversations about taking a day off from writing

June 26, 2013 by 2 Comments

Two inner conversations about taking the day off from writing, in which we explore the inner workings of the procrastinator and the recovered procrastinator. :)

Observe.

Conversation 1. The Procrastinator

Daybreak.

“Oh god. It’s too early. I don’t want to write. Besides, I need a day off. I mean, I’ve been pushing myself so hard and everything going on right now is just so stressful. Plus I couldn’t sleep well last night. I really just need some down time to regroup and get in the mood to write. There’s no point otherwise, right? I’ll just take the morning off and write in the afternoon.”

Later that morning.

“This is great! See, I really just needed some time to goof off. I can write later, it’ll be fine.”

Mid-day.

“Okay, wow, that was great. Maybe I should start writing now. But I better check my email first. And I’ve got to call Kathy too. Plus my desk is disorganized, I’ll never be able to concentrate on my writing, I better clear it off. THEN I’ll really be able to focus.”

Later.

“Where did the day go? I’m exhausted. There’s no way I can write now. I better just start over tomorrow. I can write early, when I wake up. That’ll get me back on track.”

And, repeat.

Conversation 2. The Recovered Procrastinator

Daybreak.

“I get to take today off! I hit that major milestone with my draft yesterday. I’m going to celebrate today by putting my feet up and savoring a full, glorious day of guilt-free indulgence and enjoyment. Then back to the writing tomorrow, until I hit the next milestone.”

And, repeat.

What a difference, right?

And the best part is how it FEELS inside. So. Much. Better.

Your turn

What do you think? How does procrastination FEEL to you? How does truly rewarding yourself feel when you’ve made a major accomplishment? What’s that worth to you?

Share your comments on the blog.

Warmly,

 Jenna

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Are success and failure really opposites?

June 19, 2013 by 6 Comments

A couple of weeks ago I wrote a post called “What is failure? What is success?“

As I went to publish the post, I searched for a graphic to go with it, and I was so struck by how the graphics I found showed success and failure as opposites — two things moving away from each other.

Here you can see what I mean:

failure & success

Or this version:

Success and Failure Road Sign with dramatic clouds and sky.

Pretty much the same thing, right?

Here’s another one:

Success And Failure Photo

The problem I have with these graphics is that they defy logic. I guess we’re supposed to assume that at a key crossroads in our lives we have to make the “right” decision in order to succeed. If we don’t make that “right” decision, we’ll fail. And sure, I suppose there are some truly right and wrong answers, but particularly when it comes to something like “success”, which can have so many different relative definitions, how can there always be one clear answer?

As I discussed in my earlier article, Thomas Edison made endless numbers of attempts to perfect his lightbulb. Were those attempts “failures”? Sure, I suppose in some sense they are. But didn’t those “failures” ultimately lead him to success?

And doesn’t make these graphics inherently flawed?

When you think about it, showing success and failure existing in opposite spaces is a perfect example of a “fixed mindset” versus a “growth” mindset, like Carol Dweck writes about in her book, Mindset: The New Psychology of Success.*

Dweck says that a fixed mindset is a belief that “your qualities are fixed in stone” and creates “an urgency to prove yourself over and over.” This kind of thinking leads us to believe that we only have a certain amount of talent, intelligence or character and there’s nothing we can do to improve it — save possibly making the “right” choices.

This ties right into this black or white thinking of success and failure existing only as opposites.

The growth mindset on the other hand, is “the belief that your basic qualities are things you can cultivate through your efforts.” This means that “a person’s true potential is unknown (and unknowable); that it’s impossible to foresee what can be accomplished with years of passion, toil, and training.”

If we adopt more of a growth mindset about success, it seems to me, we want a graphic that looks something more like this:

pathtosuccess

Or even like this:

pathtosuccess2

Your turn

What do you think?

I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments on the blog.

Warmly,

 Jenna

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The awkwardness of building a new writing habit

June 12, 2013 by Leave a Comment

When you first start a new habit, it’s awkward.

I’ve made the mistake more than a few times in my life of throwing in the towel if I “blow it” early in the process of building a habit.

Over time, I’ve come to see a misstep like that as a little “Oops!” and either go for a do-over or a promise myself to start again tomorrow.

This is part of why we make sure to hold our Writer’s Circle as a guilt-free zone. Yes, we’re encouraging people to write every day (and when I say we, I mean me and the other coaches for the Circle). And we also keep in mind that we are doing deep, hard work, and there will be missteps and challenges along the way. We’ve ALL struggled to create habits, and it’s no good punishing ourselves when we get off course.

I’ve seen some terrific examples of people who started out just focusing on writing 5 to 15 minutes a day and now have completed novels and scripts they can call their own. It’s very exciting!

As you embark on a new habit, here are a few things to keep in mind.

1. Remember that building a new habit can be awkward — be gentle with yourself about it.

Give yourself lots of space to make mistakes and get back on track. Don’t throw in the towel too early like I did. Instead, see anything that doesn’t work as information about what you might want to adjust as you go forward.

Recently I’ve been experimenting with increasing my daily writing time and shifting my schedule so that my writing takes an even more central role in my life. As I’ve been doing so, I’ve found myself fumbling my pretty-well established gym habit and getting caught in some awkward procrastination moments. Instead of deciding, “This isn’t working,” I’m tweaking my approach and studying my results every day to see what I can learn about what might work better for me tomorrow.

2. Approach habit building with an experimental mindset.

Along these same lines, if you approach your writing — or ANY habit — with the spirit of experimentation, you can give yourself some freedom to keep exploring until you find something that DOES work, instead of feeling like a failure for what doesn’t.

For instance, let’s say you’re trying to build a habit of writing daily and you start by committing to 5 minutes a day. But every day you find yourself not getting around to it at the end of the day and feeling too exhausted to do it. That’s good information, right? Waiting until the end of the day isn’t working. What else could you try? Morning writing? Lunchtime writing? Committing to write for 5 minutes at a specific time of day with a friend who will also write for 5 minutes at the same time?

3. If you have a rebellious nature, factor that into your plan.

If you tend to rebel against schedules and structures, try to factor that in as you plan for your new habit.

I find myself “getting all tragic” if I try to force myself to write seven days a week. (My Writer’s Circle members got a real laugh out of me saying that on one of our live coaching calls once.) Instead, I’ve committed to writing six days per week, always giving myself one day off from writing. It feeds my inner rebel and helps me feel refreshed for jumping back into writing the next day.

4. Know your procrastination tipping point and adjust accordingly.

On the other hand, you’ll also want to pay attention to when it starts to get hard to restart if and when you take days off. I’ve found that if I don’t write for a stretch of time, it’s HARD getting back on track. Up until now I’ve found that taking two days off is the point at which it gets hard for me to restart the next day, but I’m going to experiment with it further now that I’m increasing my weekday writing time.

So notice the point at which it becomes hard to restart and consider not exceeding that point whenever possible.

5. Know that it’s better to start small and start now — something is more than nothing.

Most of us who work with building regular writing habits are here for a reason — we struggle with procrastination and perfectionism more often than not (they feed each other in an endless cycle of perfectionism, procrastination, and paralysis).

An important mindset shift you’ll want to make is recognizing the value of SOME progress versus NO progress. If I had written for 15 minutes every day for the last 10 years, I’d have at least 8 to 10 scripts under my belt at the same rate I’ve been developing my current one. No guilt or blame though, just a fact.

Also, know that when you’re habit building, you’ll want to go for doing ANYTHING first, then work up to more. We like to have our writers in the Circle write even for just five minutes a day or just focus on logging in to our online site every day for the first week — simply to put the focus and attention on the writing on a daily, regular basis. After that, it gets easier to bump it up to more over time.

So remember, frequency and consistency, not quantity, at least to start. Later you can go for consistency AND quantity. :)

Join the Writer’s Circle

Join the Writer's CircleThe next session of the Writer’s Circle starts soon. Yep, we DO keep writing during the summer and year-round. If you’re struggling to write consistently or feeling alone with your writing, you’ll want to join us for inspiration, support, accountability, and camaraderie. Register and find out more here: http://JustDoTheWriting.com.

Your turn

I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments on the blog.

Warmly,

 Jenna

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What is failure? What is success?

June 5, 2013 by 4 Comments

I got into a fascinating dialogue with one of my Called to Write Community members the other day, which blossomed into a topic on our live coaching call yesterday, and I just can’t get it out of my head. 

She’d been musing with a friend over  “whether or not failure should be a factor in deciding whether or not to pursue a big project. How big a chance of success do you need to feel energized about what you’re doing? How much do you have to enjoy the task itself in order to keep moving forward when the chance of success is small? What do you do when the chance of success seems very low and you hit a snag that removes your enjoyment of the process?”

In turn it got me thinking about failure.

What is failure?

What is failure really, except one attempt that hasn’t worked?

And if we keep failing and failing and failing again, aren’t we that much closer to “succeeding?”

I’m reminded of Thomas Edison’s many light bulb creation attempts and how he saw each “failure” as information — he had discovered what didn’t work.

I’m also reminded of this excerpt of lines from the movie Contact, one of my favorites of all time:

Executive: “We must confess that your proposal seems less like science and more like science fiction.”

Ellie Arroway: “Science fiction. Well you’re right, it’s crazy. In fact, it’s even worse than that, nuts.”

[slams down her briefcase and marches up to the desk]

Ellie Arroway: “You wanna hear something really nutty? I heard of a couple guys who wanna build something called an ‘airplane’, you know, you get people to go in, and fly around like birds, it’s ridiculous, right? And what about breaking the sound barrier, or rockets to the moon, or atomic energy, or a mission to Mars? Science fiction, right? Look, all I’m asking, is for you to just have the tiniest bit of vision. You know, to just sit back for one minute and look at the big picture. To take a chance on something that just might end up being the most profoundly impactful moment for humanity, for the history… of history.”

All too often, success requires an incredible level of risk, vision, perseverance, and belief — and we have to find it within ourselves to generate those necessary ingredients.

If we define failure as not achieving the results we are pursuing, we can choose to try something new, rather than defining it as a personal failing, or even defining it as a failure at all. We can think of it as information.

We often are told that we have to define success on our own terms.

Perhaps we should also define failure on our own terms.

We each have to know, individually inside ourselves, when it is time to “call it” and walk away from an idea or a project or an attempt and when we need to keep forging ahead. (Seth Godin talks about this more in his book The Dip). My experience is that we’re usually closest to a breakthrough when our inner critics and our fears are screaming at us in the loudest possible voices, which is when we’re most likely to quit.

Those voices usually say something like, “You’ll never make it. You’ll never figure it out. You’ve failed, you’re a failure.”

And I think that if we define failure as a personal flaw or character deficit, we will be more likely to walk away from a project too soon in the process.

And isn’t it really about enjoying the process as well — whatever IT is? Light bulbs, writing, painting. Whatever it is for you.

What is success?

And what is success?

Is it when we get paid? Or paid a certain amount of money?

Is it when we get recognized?

Is it when people like it?

Did Joss Whedon (one of my writing heroes) only really succeed when The Avengers was so financially successful? Or had he succeeded far earlier than that?

Is it something we only know when we get there?

And then what? Isn’t there more after that anyway? It’s not usually like it is in the movies, where we reach a “final” climactic success and the credits roll, right? Life goes on.

Just like it does after a “failure.”

Make your own definitions

When I took a class with Corey Mandell, he talked about defining our successes based on something that we actually have the ability to control, like finishing our projects, writing or working prolifically, picking out skills we want to develop further and strengthen for ourselves, honing our craft, and building a solid writing habit.

When we define successes and failures on extrinsic variables we can’t control, well, as Corey said, “Welcome to hell.”

Your Turn

So how have you defined success and failure so far? Might you adjust your definitions to bring them within your own control? What would that be like for you?

I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments. 

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Ask Jenna: Isn’t reading a “real” book more important than writing my own?

May 29, 2013 by 6 Comments

I received an intriguing question from a reader the other day and asked for his permission to share my response on my blog. Who knows, “Ask Jenna” may become a “thing”! If you have a question you’d like to ask for the blog, feel free to submit it to my team via our contact form and I’ll put it into the hopper.

Here goes:

Ask Jenna: Isn’t reading a “real” book more important than writing my own?

Hi Jenna,

I just bought and watched your “10 Practical Tips for More Consistent, Productive Writing,” and since I was way too late to pose a question, I’ll ask it now.

In response to the question about what interferes with my writing, my first thought was, “Reading!”

Writers need to read; I know that.

But I love reading; I usually have 5 or 6 books going at once because I can’t wait to finish one before I start another. My list grows faster than I can keep up with it.

But it also interferes with my writing. It always seems to me that a “real” book is more important, more worth my time, than my own work-in-progress which may never appear outside my critique group.

How do I overcome THIS negative thought?

~ Michael

diamonds2

Dear Michael,

That’s a great question — and you’ve also raised a good point. Writers do benefit tremendously from reading (I have a big stack of books I’m reading through myself!) — it’s a critical part of learning about writing. But so is actually putting words on the page and struggling through the process of laboring over our own work.

Part of what I hear in your question is the notion that other people’s writing has more value than your own. Why is that? Yes, as a society we have agreed that published works are generally more of an accomplishment than unpublished works, and yet we’ve all heard tales of languishing but high caliber projects that one day get discovered.

But even underneath that, I suspect, lurks a deeper truth or deeper fear. And it reads to me like a combination of fear and self-doubt. The self-doubt is more obvious, “What if my project never lives up to the quality of this one?” and “What if this is never published, i.e. what’s the point of even working on it when there’s no guarantee of it appearing outside my critique group?”

When we ask ourselves questions like this, our subconscious minds love to get busy answering them and providing evidence that they are likely to come true. “See, there’s someone else’s project, it’s so much better than mine. And there’s another one,” and so on. Or in the case of the second question, it’s, “That’s right, I’ll never get anywhere. I heard that so-and-so never got their book published after years of working on it.”

We have to learn to ask better questions.

Here’s the thing. If we want better answers, we have to learn to ask better questions, like “How can I raise the bar on this project to get to the level of quality I want to see?” Or, “I wonder how I can increase the chances of this book being published?”

Then we start getting new, better answers and evidence.

We have to believe in our own value.

Just because you haven’t yet published a book doesn’t mean you don’t have something of value to say. In fact, your readers are waiting for your work and on some level, they’re suffering for the lack of it right now. It may take a while for you to clear the greasy sludge out of the writing gears and get going, but that’s all part of the process and completely normal.

I have a strong belief that if you’re called to write, you have something to say that’s important to get out there, even if you aren’t 100% clear on what it is yet. And it’s important to note that figuring it out happens through the writing of it, not the other way around.

We have to remember the practice of writing has intrinsic value.

Writing, as a practice, not an only an outcome, has its own intrinsic value. Writing teaches us how to write. Writing teaches how to live. Struggling to make it through the mid-point of a project, pressing on to the bitter end, seeing it through to completion — these are life skills that have lasting value. Through writing we learn that we do have what it takes to finish a project. We learn to trust ourselves. We find our voices and make them stronger, and clearer. We learn how far we’re willing to go into the depths of our work and what we can bring out of it. And we learn to go deeper, even when we’re afraid.

We have to learn to write through the fear.

And yes, let’s talk about the fear. Because underneath most reasons for why we can’t write is fear. Whether it looks like indecision about picking a project, boredom just when we get to the end, confusion when we struggle through the midpoint, or other books to read that are so much more enticing, usually what’s going on is that deep down, we are afraid to commit, afraid we’ll get it “wrong”, and afraid to face the demons and doubts that will come up along the way.

Writing is a tricky business. Our inner critics will do everything and anything they can to sabotage us at every step of the game — start to finish, beginning to end, and everywhere in between.

The answer?

Don’t listen.

It doesn’t matter what it’s saying, that voice of fear, but if it’s stopping you from writing, say, “Thank you for sharing” and get back to doing the work.

Let’s not stop here.

Because I always like to tackle the deeper underlying stuff AND integrate it with real, practical, take-action steps, here is something very simple and practical you can do to honor your love for reading and use it to help you get your writing done too:

  1. Designate a time for writing and a time for reading. Writing first, then reading.
  2. Make reading your reward for doing the writing.
  3. Rinse and repeat: Do it again the next day.

Your turn

What does this spark for you? We’d love to hear from you in the comments.

Warmly,

 Jenna

Thanks for reading.
Image by © Royalty-Free/Corbis

 

 

Filed Under: Ask Jenna, Writing Tagged With: , , ,

Writers Get Organized

May 22, 2013 by 7 Comments

Today’s article is on the subject of organizing and simplifying for writers, in a Q&A format with me and with my colleague Miriam Ortiz y Pino. Miriam helped me reorganize my office and design my schedule to help streamline my workflow and it’s made a big difference in what I’ve been able to accomplish.

We pulled together this list of questions from our Writer’s Circle members and from other frequently asked questions writers often pose to me.

If YOU have a question about organizing and simplifying your writing life that’s not covered here, not to worry. Miriam and I will be hanging out today and answering questions posted in the comments section on the blog. So if you have a question, be sure to post it promptly and we’ll do our best to answer it for you.

 

Q: What’s the best way to find extra time in my day?

Miriam: Creating routines, so that you become more masterful over the actions in the routine, allow you to get it done more quickly. You also will be able to do most repeatable things with a lower brain function because you develop muscle memory. That saves effort. Those little bits add up over the course of a day, a week, a month, and by the end of the year can save up to 6 weeks.

Jenna: I learned a ton from Miriam about making sure that I was using my time as effectively as possible, and routines have definitely become a mainstay solution for me. The Four in me (from the Enneagram) rebels against routine and structure (more on this below), but I’ve found that it makes writing (and other things) possible for me in a way that I hadn’t quite seen before. And, at the end of the day, if you’re having trouble finding time to write, put it at the beginning of the day. It’s an incredible boon to carve out time for you and your writing in the priority spot of your life.

 

Q: I hate structure. How can I make a regular routine for writing or creating when I rebel against it?

Miriam: If you don’t want to create structure or routine for your writing or creating, try making routines out of the other repetitive tasks in your life. Things like grocery shopping, processing the mail, and invoicing clients become easier with repetition, so they take both less time and less effort. That is how you save up to 2 hours a day – a little bit at a time. Just think of all the fun stuff you could do!

Jenna: Even though so many creatives (me included) rebel against structure, I’m amused to find that it’s something that truly makes a difference when it comes to writing productively and consistently for me. My take is to try out creating a structure for your creative work. You may actually be surprised to find you like it. And once you are in the habit of creating regularly, then start introducing variations. I’ve gained a tremendous amount of freedom in most of my life by creating a small amount of structure in part of my life, while in the past, when I had little or no structure at all, my life was much more stressful and chaotic.

 

Q: I hate systems and I want to rebel against them. How can I find super simple solutions that work without feeling rebellious?

Miriam: You can’t deny feelings. So, I suggest calling your system something else. How about method, or scheme? That way you can feel rebellious and still accomplish something. Then start with the end result you are seeking and reverse engineer the project. That usually provides the simplest solution.

Jenna: I love the idea of calling it something else, especially a scheme! Structure, systems, discipline, focus, goals — we creative types have learned to think of these as bad things that interfere with our creativity. But do they? Or are they simply useful containers that help us channel our efforts into finished results?

 

Q: What do I do when I want to write but my office is filled with clutter?

Miriam: Begin removing the clutter. It’s actually better to work on a little at a time so you get the benefit of practicing making decisions. It’s just an editing process with things instead of with words. Once you decide you don’t need something, remove it from the space.

Your creative space needs to be a sacred space where you honor your muse. I recommend starting with your desk. Take everything off of it, and dust it. Then return only the things you need to write with. Perhaps a pen and a pad and a computer is all you really need. You can put the pen in a pen cup. You can add a cup of coffee. Keep enough space to lay out the file with the stuff about the idea you are working on. Everything else needs to live elsewhere.

Jenna: As much as my office can get cluttered, I do feel better and in a higher vibration space for writing when I clear the decks first. Working with Miriam to take everything out and then only bring back what actually belonged was tremendously freeing for me. 

 

Q: What suggestions do you have for tracking, organizing, and saving writing ideas, and writing projects?

Miriam: Keep your ideas in one place – a notebook, a computer file, a box, a bowl – it doesn’t matter what form – it matters that you are consistent in storing your initial ideas there.

Then mine the idea place for your projects. When you begin work on a particular idea, start a file or other place for it to live for the duration of the work. Don’t forget to cross it off, take it out, or delete it from the idea place.

 Jenna: I have most of my current project ideas in Evernote, so I can take them with me (and add to them) on the go. I do also have some paper files. Like Miriam says, consistency is the key; there’s no one right answer. The beauty of all this consistency, structure, and systematic methodology is that once you decide what your method is, you don’t have to keep deciding every time you come up with a new project idea.

 

Q: What do I do with my project – and the associated mess – once I’m done?

Miriam: The last step of any project is to put away your toys. In other words, file the finished product with flair. Recycle any drafts, they are things you decided against so they need to go. Research gets tossed or returned to a file depending on if you had to footnote it. Clear the desk of any lingering notes about the project.

Now you can pull a new idea from your idea place and start a fresh project.

Jenna: Cleaning up at the end of a project is a lovely way of completing the energy associated with it. It’s harder for me to let go of interim drafts but I like the notion of it. :) I tend to keep an “archive” copy of my last draft with my notes in it, and the final one on my computer (with a redundant copy in Dropbox* so it’s stored off site).

 

Q: I’d love to know any tricks for organizing the massive amount of hard-copy printouts of my drafts (when I print them out to read through and edit). They end up in stacks or spread out in various places on my office floor. Seems there has to be a better way than having stacks with bunches of sticky notes attached to them.

Miriam: You have actually described an excellent system for editing. What may be a problem is not sticking to your decisions. Once you print out and mark up a copy, input the changes and toss each page as you do. If you have to leave a pile between writing sessions, use a giant binder clip to keep each version neat.

If you have the space to stack, by project, in a bin, basket, or behind a cabinet door, it can help with the cluttered feeling between sessions.

Jenna: It’s tricky to deal with the visual clutter between writing sessions, especially for more sensitive types. I like the idea I learned from a old boss, to have a “staging” area where I can keep works in progress “neatly” stacked (I do have to remind myself to do this!).

 

Q: What should I do with early drafts?

Miriam: Recycle them, they represent things you decided against.

Jenna: Ditching old drafts is a tougher one for me, but I like the principle behind it, and that’s why we’ve invited Miriam to consult with us! As writers, we do have to keep making choices along the way about our work, and I like the idea of getting in the habit of trusting ourselves and knowing we can revise later if we need to.

 

Q: How do I quickly refocus if I get interrupted?

Miriam: It is much easier to refocus when there isn’t a lot of clutter, and when you are in the habit of working at a certain time. However, you can quickly refocus by closing your eyes, taking a deep breath and then actually asking yourself “ok, now where was I?”

Jenna: And I do a lot to make sure I don’t get interrupted in the first place — see below.

 

Q: How do I keep from getting interrupted in the first place?

Miriam: Good communication with potential interrupters is essential. Turn off the ringer, alarms, and close the door. Tell people you expect not to be disturbed – put up a sign if you have to.

Establish good boundaries around your creative and work time. Then enforce them. Boundaries work because they anticipate and accommodate other people’s problems with them. “In half an hour, I’m all yours.”

Don’t think of it as being unavailable for an hour, think of it as being with a client – your muse – right now and that you will be MORE available in an hour for others.

Jenna: We do have to think of our writing as being JUST AS IMPORTANT as most other things (excluding true emergencies of course). Setting great boundaries around our writing time is truly a critical and important part of the process. We have to be willing to tell the people in our lives that we have other priorities too.

 

Q: How do I decide what to work on?

Miriam: Well, it doesn’t really matter. You can use your intuition, ask the Magic 8 Ball, follow a matrixed schedule, or throw darts at your to do list. None of these will work if you don’t only pick from things that get you to your goals and are in alignment with your values.

A good rule of thumb is to have your routines in place so the stuff that must get done gets done. Then pick 1-3 other things to achieve each day.

Don’t start new projects until you are done with the one you are working on. It is faster in the long run to work on just 3-4 at a time in various stages (outline, draft, final edit) and add in one as each one completes.

Jenna: I have a bunch of those kinds of tricks to help people hone in on picking a project, which is often quite difficult for many creatives. One thing to recognize is that having too many ideas may actually be a commitment issue. In other words, you’re afraid to commit, pick the wrong project, fail, etc. So if you don’t actually pick a project, you’ll never fail, never face the blank page, not have to “give up” on a particular project. But it also keeps everything locked in idea stage. So get some help tuning into the project you want to do first. (More on the subject of “Overcoming Indecision” coming soon, stay tuned.)

On the subject of routines, I agree with Miriam with the clarification that I recommend doing the writing first and making sure the routines don’t swallow up potential writing time (or expand to fill it). Be careful. Resistance is sneaky.

 

Q: What can I do when my excuses are really procrastination?

Miriam: Begin anyway. Play games with your procrastination. Set fake deadlines, use ridiculous associations, throw a tantrum and then do it anyway.

Jenna: Yeah, it’s procrastination. I’ve never met an excuse that isn’t truly fear, doubt, anxiety, resistance, etc in disguise. Figure out how to you-proof your writing and then just do it. The Writer’s Circle is a great help with this.

 

Your turn

What are your questions about getting organized or simplifying your writing, your writing process, life, or schedule? Post your questions in the comments on the blog and Miriam and I will answer them for you.

 

miriamMiriam Ortiz y Pino is a Certified Professional Organizer, Simplicity Expert and Coach, Entrepreneur, Writer, Blogger, and Creator of The Streamlined System. She works with entrepreneurs and other busy and creative people to eliminate the distractions, simplify systems and create routines so they can get it all done practically effortlessly. You can find Miriam at http://www.morethanorganized.net.

 

 

Thanks Miriam!

Warmly,

 Jenna

Image by © Helen King/CORBIS 

Thanks for reading.

 

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